When They're Not Fighting
- Speak with one or both of your parents about how their fighting affects you. It is best you can do this with the two of them present. It is better so they can both know how you feel!
During a Fight
- Leave the room if at all possible. Go into your room, put on your headphones and crank up the stereo if you must. The further away you are from the "line of fire" (verbally speaking) the less likely you'll be emotionally drained from the experience. Another word, when they are fighting leave the room. You DO NOT need to hear this.
- Recognize that they are not fighting because of you. This is true even if your name comes into the conversation. In this case it has more to do with a disagreement between parenting styles and little to do with any misbehavior on your part. Remember that, it was never nor now your fault.
- Stay confident. Don't let this issue get in the way of how you feel about yourself. Try to say a couple good things about yourself before you go to school, or even anywhere.
- Remind yourself that this issue will end. Slowly but surely, it will end.
After the Fight
- Do an emotional check-up. It's quite normal for your feelings to run the gamut from anger to sadness and back again after a stressful situation. Allow yourself to feel these emotions in an appropriate manner such as crying or screaming into a pillow or even something creative such as writing a poem or painting a picture can help.
- Approach your parents when you and they are ready. If any of you need a longer cooling down period than allow that time to pass before you try speaking with them.
- Remind them of how much it bothers you when they fight. This is not the time for a long drawn out discussion a simple phrase such as "Please don't fight around me" will suffice.
- Forgive and move forward.